Condiment King

So,I had to go to the grocery store and I was wandering around, as I am want to do in food stores (oohhh so many colors and shapes) then I came across my favorite area. The condiment section, I did not buy anything of course because I am in condiment rehab. I have a sickness that makes my buy way too many sauces and and dressings so my wife has forbade me from buying anymore until we get rid of what we have in about five months if we start using barbecue sauce (my true Achilles heal) on our cereal.

The reason I love condiments so much, well every other food item is pretty much locked up. In the cereals it's all about the major cereals, same with meats, and even frozen foods, soft drinks, and bread. It's all about General mills, Coca Cola, Jimmie Dean, Wonder Bread, blah, blah, blah. Even if you think a new exciting food item is on the market-- trust me it's not, because look a little closer and it is make by some big boring company. BUT not the condiments my friend. The condiment sections is the last frontier for an euntriprnurial young up and comer. I LOVE condiments. You could be in your backyard throwing together a bunch of crap to bbq your beef and and the next day put it in a bottle and take it down to the local HY-VEE store an who knows they might put it on the shelf right next to the big boys of barbecue sauce. It's only in the condiment lane that I realizes there are sauces I can't live without. There is a sauce for wild game, yes if you have shot something yourself and need a sauce for it some redneck had gone into production for YOU. Hell there were at least five such sauces last time I saw, granted I live in Nebraska but still.

There is a jar called "The Gravy Master" no, it's not gravy in a can, it's some sort of gravy concentrate, I don't know, so you can, what, add a little and save the time and money making all that gravy by yourself. I'm not sure, but that is what I love about the condiment section, it's full of mystery, questions about lifestyle, and just strange condiments. Who IS the "Gravy Master" some mad condiment making fool with delusions of grandeur no doubt, but just maybe he is the master of all the gravy he oversees. Who knows but condiments is where the Gravy Master's dreams came true.

I will be back to talk about condiments again my friends don't you worry.